Sunday, December 20, 2009

Missing Something

How many times in a day you feel the above, today as i am sitting alone, this thought comes up in my mind every now & then. This one thought hits everybody & hits u hard when you are the most busy in life.

For months, i have been on a ride, a ride of experiences, learning,fast paced life where you want to keep everybody happy.But i have not been at my best at many situations & have been absurd,pathetic & have acted low. But all this time, i din realize, i was missing on anything, i was jus moving in one direction which i thought was right & ignoring everything i kept on moving.

Slowly, i was turning into a loner which something, i was never. I dunno whether i was liking it or not or i am gonna continue with it. Today i miss spending some more quality time with her, today i miss having some fun with frendz rather than just opening facebook & getting to know whats happening.

Now She's gone & i feel , it would have been much better if i would have fought less over where to eat, to go shopping or not, to walk or to talk. Today i miss everything & i got to know, i liked even waiting outside the trial room & having endless paani poori everytime. I liked the fights over "Pink" colour & length of my hair.
I miss watching a movie 2-3 times with her, entering the theatre late & then sleeping in between. I miss waiting for her to go through dozens of clothes & picking another dozen to come to a conclusion to pick one. I miss our shoplifting experience. I miss the late night auto rides,going back home...

I miss waiting outside her place (something i have fought the most about it bringing her to tears). I miss my experience with Sambhar rice & other stuff including eating with hand.

I miss the walks, I miss begging her to let me smoke one & jus one cigarette.I miss she shrugging for paying the auto driver more & her lectures on saving money :)

I miss her annoying talks on how she messed up her exam & i reading her out the discussion on forums, how she has not messed up.

I miss paying for her shopping bills, which exceed my budget & then she returning them back to get something for me.

But the most i miss is being with her, just sitting and talking endlessly & she listening as she is most bothered.

But something i missed on the way was saying "Sorry" & "Thankyou" more times than i said.
I missed on giving her flowers, though she said 100 times indirectly to me. I missed on being more understanding, when she was going through some bad times.I missed on saying, "For me too", when she said, "These were the best 6 months ever".
I hope we get another chance to live the above moments & I'l try to make it up in the best possible way.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

When you miss Frendz

This post is not Sentii, So plz dont take it that way & its not gay. LOL
This post is dedicated to all the great human beings with whom i cherish my frendship.

This is about remembering some good old times when u sat with frends, talked bullshit & gained wisdom out of it. I miss those times today, in contrast to these days,where my day starts with sitting in front of my & ends up there with a can or two in my hand.
But you miss all that freaking out, pulling legs session, talking about things like "After-Life" or weird ones like,appu's fav "Kiski biwi uska kya haal karegi" , with the most hilarious predictions.

I miss the times, when ppl use to come to my room to have a smoke or when i used to go to Bihari's or Gogo's Room when short on them(Cigs). I miss that one last cig which we used to share,everybody trying to drag the most out of it.,a whole pack today won't suffice today as the former was fun.

I miss the chaotic game plans made by chimp & arpat to win there dota games against raju & party. I miss stealing out Chimp's Pinnis when hes fckin busy playin DOTA.

I miss the plans we used to make, like "Who will keep which pet when hel be a billionaire" & what not.

I miss me n raghav pulling hash's leg over everything, right from his Beard to long hair.
I miss Drunk Bhai.
I miss Nath, scratchin his head on the morning of any exam, confused as to where to start or whether to start or not.

I miss Harsh for all those Navy Cuts & all the good times at velinos.
I miss commenting on Jazzy's Baby Legs.

Nagraj !!! U jus cant forget the name, leave apart the personality.

I miss Nbabu, for his Kaju Barfi & his practical but honest comments.

I miss the Gogo,walking up n down the corridor on the day of Maths Tests.

I miss Bihari for his sentiap on fckin everything.

I miss Chandy for his Chandyaap.

I miss Buddha, playin with sm instrument which falls under electronics & not allowing me n raghav to bother him at that time.

You can't Miss Appu, hes always around pulling your leg, hes like the glue which makes us all stick together in all good n bad times.

Above all, i miss all the good times we all lived in that corridor. All that, jus keeps coming back & will always n puts a smile on my face.

So heres a toast of new KF Blue to all those mentioned above !!!

Cheers !!!

Monday, March 16, 2009

The right thing

Today i experienced something that shook me for the rest of my life.Dunno it"l keep me affecting till when but i faced the reality of life.

Yeah the bitter truth that we see each day surpass us each day n each second but we jus believe that its nt real, its jus sum thing that we feel but is nt real.
I meet people, meet different personalities, i am 21 years of age and according to me i am old enough to see things which are transparent and which of them are just translucent.

In all these years, i was trying hard to get education, trying to be at the top of the class in terms of grades or skills if nt grades, falling distant apart from the bitter reality of this existent world.
Bt today when i gt into the slums of my country or slums of dis world, i face similar situations which i have read in my books, which i thought just of as hypothetical in my fantasy world or u might have spoken of them in your presentations in your social responsibility lectures.

Bt the harsh reality is nothing has changed much in developing countries like us, the rich has become more rich, the poor has become more poor and the middle class has improved itself in putting more effort than earlier, so basically nothing has changed..

The change has come, but wat if these changes just affect a portion of our population just those who understand dese changes & those who were wealthy enough to create them in the first place.What abt ppl who don't even know that dese changes tuk place in real. For them its still that tough fight for survival & nothing more.They are still fighting those evils created by the custodians of society who had access to more power & wealth.

21 years back, Slums were still slums 21 yrs from now slums will still be slum, then wat are ppl like us doing, what is the importance of education.
If education satisfies that my country can be 3rd in the race for no. of lunar missions than no. of slums and no. of female babies being killed annual, wat will we prefer.

Education to me after today has lost its colour and the integrity it offered.
Today i met a guy, who earns a little amount of money to feed his family in a petty bar, wherein i went to satisfy me quench for the frustration against this world. Luckily, he was doing the same.

He told me, he loved his kids and his wife, but he can't earn that much to educate his kids. He loved his wife but he had to make her wife undergo a surgery to control the number of kids who were spaced just 6 months & even less den dat. He wants to educate his kids and be like us but then education in itself today is a business and he can't satisfy the requirements of that business.
So maybe, his kids won't end up like us who will get access to education/quality education that your or my kids will get access to but than who do we blame dis for???

Education is a monopoly, knowledge was d term it was called before this, but then economics, a study of money and business came in the picture and destroyed everything.

Today we blame, illiteracy for a lot of deeds in the world, at times we blame countries, at times we blame particular societies for it. Terrorism, the biggest black spot on the collar of the world community is lack of education.

But then, ain't we, who have access to this kind of knowledge has made difficult for other people to gain access to our knowledge bank. We have split ourselves into communal profited organizations who impart knowledge/ethics based on monetary benefits.

The one whos taught by the registered church is a follower of a particular religion making ppl believe in certain ethics, but then whos a terrorist, hes just a follower of a certain rules of ethics taught to him by some teacher.
Being Ethical & unethical is just a belief of on wat side of the situation you are,
But if we wudnt have created distinction amidst ppl who impart and who gain education, the world would have been a better place i guess.

We concentrate on living in a world which is better for us & not for all, we all are just selfish as anybody.
The present religion taught us, present education has emphasis on it, but if we ever want a change, we need to understand, Thers only one thing which existed from Day1 & till the end is humanity because we were

Born Alone, To live Alone but in coherence to the fact that we"l keep people around us to live too.
Because survival for many years is considered to be a selfish thing.

We need to diminish, i am from this country, this society, this class of ppl, this race.

Its time to believe in the fact we are humans & what we do is to help each other & not to help our country,our religion,our race etc.

So believe in urself & the people around you & help them to get them on the right path.