Sunday, December 20, 2009

Missing Something

How many times in a day you feel the above, today as i am sitting alone, this thought comes up in my mind every now & then. This one thought hits everybody & hits u hard when you are the most busy in life.

For months, i have been on a ride, a ride of experiences, learning,fast paced life where you want to keep everybody happy.But i have not been at my best at many situations & have been absurd,pathetic & have acted low. But all this time, i din realize, i was missing on anything, i was jus moving in one direction which i thought was right & ignoring everything i kept on moving.

Slowly, i was turning into a loner which something, i was never. I dunno whether i was liking it or not or i am gonna continue with it. Today i miss spending some more quality time with her, today i miss having some fun with frendz rather than just opening facebook & getting to know whats happening.

Now She's gone & i feel , it would have been much better if i would have fought less over where to eat, to go shopping or not, to walk or to talk. Today i miss everything & i got to know, i liked even waiting outside the trial room & having endless paani poori everytime. I liked the fights over "Pink" colour & length of my hair.
I miss watching a movie 2-3 times with her, entering the theatre late & then sleeping in between. I miss waiting for her to go through dozens of clothes & picking another dozen to come to a conclusion to pick one. I miss our shoplifting experience. I miss the late night auto rides,going back home...

I miss waiting outside her place (something i have fought the most about it bringing her to tears). I miss my experience with Sambhar rice & other stuff including eating with hand.

I miss the walks, I miss begging her to let me smoke one & jus one cigarette.I miss she shrugging for paying the auto driver more & her lectures on saving money :)

I miss her annoying talks on how she messed up her exam & i reading her out the discussion on forums, how she has not messed up.

I miss paying for her shopping bills, which exceed my budget & then she returning them back to get something for me.

But the most i miss is being with her, just sitting and talking endlessly & she listening as she is most bothered.

But something i missed on the way was saying "Sorry" & "Thankyou" more times than i said.
I missed on giving her flowers, though she said 100 times indirectly to me. I missed on being more understanding, when she was going through some bad times.I missed on saying, "For me too", when she said, "These were the best 6 months ever".
I hope we get another chance to live the above moments & I'l try to make it up in the best possible way.